Not Your Daughter’s Knees

Imagine my excitement!

Have you noticed? Nothing fits. If it fits, it’s downright dumpy.  Or made out of recycled soda bottles.  Things used to fit.  They fit fine when I was 25.  But I haven’t seen 25 in a good many years, and it’s possible I haven’t found a pair of remotely stylish jeans that really fit in about as long. Gah.

Well, somebody finally realized that there’s this whole big bunch of women out there who are not 25 any longer. What a concept.  Not only that, there’s this “Baby Boomer” thing, and none of Baby Boomers, not one of the more than 400,000 of them, is 25 any longer.  And it stands to reason that about half of these Baby Boomers are women.  Hmmm, maybe there’s a market there…

Gee, ya think?

And along came a product called Not Your Daughter’s Jeans. Whoa, Nelly! Shut the front door! Jeans made for women who have been keeping the home fires burning, raising children, juggling career and family, while keeping the planet populated, for heaven’s sake?  Jeans made for women with bodies that have lived?  I was excited.

Now, you know that fashion doesn’t come cheap.  Dumpy, ill-fitting jeans are affordable. But jeans that actually fit?  Oh, no, Grasshopper.  There is a handsome price to pay for stylishness.  Still.  Jeans that fit. It might be worth it.

So the first Nordstrom’s I see, I’m there, in the Jeans Department (yes, they actually have a whole department of nothing but jeans, 98% of them made for women under 25).  I find the rack with a nice selection of these “jeans that fit,” and pick out a few pairs that actually look new.  No holes, frayed edged, bleached-out spots, just nice-looking new jeans in my size.  I go into the dressing room,  and with great trepidation, I start to pull a pair on.  At about the point where the typical pair of fashionable jeans starts to meet resistance, these jeans actually continue on up to the waist.  And they fasten.  And then I take a step.  Oh-oh. What the heck?  Oh, no-o-o-o! These terrific-looking jeans fit everywhere like they were made for me.  Everywhere except for the knees.

OK, maybe it’s just that cut. I try on every pair, and every. single. pair. of. them. is. too. tight. in. the. knees.

These may be Not your Daughter’s Jeans, but they are apparently made for your daughter’s knees.

(sigh)

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22 Responses to Not Your Daughter’s Knees

  1. gospelwriter says:

    Sigh, is right. Has it ever been this difficult finding things to fit, at any price? I finally did find a pair of jeans that fit, even in the knees (and they weren’t NYDJ’s), paid for them too – but decided I was worth every penny. 🙂 I had almost decided I was going to have to start sewing my own clothes again…

    • PattiKen says:

      Well, if we were under 25, it would be no problem at all. I’m glad you found jeans that really fit. I’m resigned to being dumpy. No one is looking anyway, right? 😉

      Thanks for visiting. I appreciate it.

  2. mairmusic says:

    hah– too funny! Yes we all deserve good jeans. Not sure where your poem for the Rally is located, but I have had fun reading your v.interesting posts here 🙂
    http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/

    • PattiKen says:

      Glad you had a chuckle. Thank you for visiting!

      P.S. I don’t officially participate in the Poets Rally, but all my “creative” stuff is on PattiKen and the Muses on Blogger. It includes prose, poetry and some photography. I started this blog here on WordPress as a place to just ramble and rant. Home away from home, you know?

  3. cindy says:

    Oh my hat, you sure made me laugh … and I soooo feel your pain 🙂

    • PattiKen says:

      I’m glad this brought a laugh. If we couldn’t keep our sense of humor about it all, we’d be in a bad place for sure.

      Thanks for dropping in for a cuppa. I hope you’ll come again.

  4. Jingle says:

    love your humor.
    lovely post!

  5. Jingle says:

    http://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/08/30/thursday-poets-rally-week-27-awards/
    Poets Rally Week 27 awards,
    All 5 4 u, enjoy!
    Happy Monday,
    Rally week 28 will be September 9-15…..Welcome!

  6. Jamie Dedes says:

    I am falling out of my chair laughing. I’ve had that tooooo tight at the knees thing happen – a lot – … lucky for me I have a son. I just wear his hand-me-downs. It makes for a sort of gal-on-the-street Whoopi Goldberg look … According to the younger generation though, we’re not supposed to press our jeans???!!! Mom and the nuns would die …

    I would love to repost this, Patti… I know my friends would enjoy it immensly and it deserves as wide an audience as possible. All credits and links as appropriate … Let me know, smart, funny lady … 🙂

    • PattiKen says:

      Oh, you are so kind!

      Post way, my friend. I welcome the chance to commiserate with as many fellow victims of fashion as possible. Grousing all alone is no fun.

      And any time you want to get going on the nuns, just let me know. I’m still licking many “wounds” from those days that still smart when poked. (I know, I know, stop poking at them).

  7. Pingback: Not Your Daughter’s Knees (via PattiKen and the Muses – Home Away from Home) « MUSING BY MOONLIGHT

  8. slpmartin says:

    I’m still chuckling about your post…a very witty post and a pleasant read.

  9. Neva Flores says:

    What an awesome post!

  10. souldipper says:

    I identify! Even with the threat of taking up sewing again. Flowing, light, swirly, sensuous, forgiving, enhancing, and accentuating the positive. What would be wrong with that? Thanks for such eloquent company.

    • PattiKen says:

      Thank you for your visit and comments. I agree completely with your wish list. Yes, what would be wrong with that? And I’ll add, how hard could that be? Geez.

      Thanks again for coming. I hope you’ll come back.

  11. oh nooooo, knees aren’t my problem, the other bits are FAR worse.

    thanks for the giggle and the knowledge that others too find clothes are all for the young

    Whet I really want to know is do the clothing manufacturers really want to see us wobbling around with NO clothes on. That’s why they should be making them for us even more that the pretty young things

    • PattiKen says:

      Normally, That is my problem too, all the parts and pieces I have as souvenirs of years gone past. That’s what I was so thrilled to be able to get those stylish jeans up and over. But who knew I had fat knees? Gah. The image of us wobbling around en flagrante should be enough to scare them into designing adequate cover, wouldn’t you think?

      Thanks for coming. I hope you’ll come back.

  12. moondustwriter says:

    What a hoot.

    I cant fit my daughters’ jeans especially the size 0 daughter, but one day I accidentally wore my son’s jeans. So they need to retail “these are your son’s jeans.”

    nice one Patti

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